Anabaptist, Mennonite, Amish Sexual abuse

Ohio Missionary, Jeriah Mast, Indicted for Child Exploitation Crimes in Haiti

Splsh4Ripls5 Comments

Generally, I no longer write, and definitely don’t do blogs, due to severe issues with my left hand and arm when doing so, and consequences I suffer for sitting. But today, I am resurfacing to do an update on Jeriah Mast’s crimes in Haiti.

On December 2, 2025, Jeriah Mast was charged on four counts of engaging in illicit sexual conduct with minors. (Read the article here: Ohio Missionary Indicted for Child Exploitation Crimes in Haiti) The question many have is, why only four? The answer is simple. Christian Aid Ministries – and God forbid we call it what it is and say they “paid off the victims in exchange for silence” – paid victims. Whatever justification or excuse for offering those funds, it effectively silenced most victims. Let me say this, I will thank God for the four. And I will celebrate Mast’s arrest. 

In the past I have been accused of ‘finding joy when one more Mennonite man is arrested.’ If that is how you read that last sentence in the first paragraph, let me break it down in simplest of terms. 

I. Thank. God. When. Any. Predator. Is. Brought. To. Justice. 

I do not care if religious or other. I do not care if male or female. I do not care if Mennonite, Amish, Catholic, Protestant, atheist, gay, straight, political, advocate, or any other affiliation or lack thereof. 

I never celebrate that there are predators. I have never thrilled at exposing them because of their culture. But, in any culture, I will always celebrate when truth is brought to light and when children are protected. 

I thank God because one child, somewhere, or maybe a 100 or more, will not be abused by that predator. At least not while they are locked up. Because most reoffend when they are released. 

Today, years after flying to Haiti in June of 2019 – which I did because there were signs of extreme coverup by Christian Aid Ministries – today, I thank God that Jeriah Mast will face the law for what he did to at least four of the countless children he is alleged to have harmed.

I will never forget being told, in semi-whispers, about Mast’s alleged crimes in Haiti. The individual who told me about it knew I was an advocate who would not be silent, and did not tell me his name, or any information to easily find him. What they did not account for, was my uncanny ability to piece things together, and in a child sex assault case with current minors, you better believe I gave all I had, regardless of relational fallout. 

I had no name. Not a first name. Not a last name. I only had several tiny snippets of information. He had worked for Christian Aid Ministries for years. He was conservative Anabaptist. I was quite sure I knew what state he was from. And I knew some basic family ties of in-laws, though not many names. With that I sat down at the computer and began digging. There was no way that any person – especially religious – would go abroad and harm children without being brought face to face with the law, if I could help it. Not on my watch. I found his name after much sleuthing. And somehow I knew. 

I messaged the individual who spoke with me about a couple fleeing Haiti because of allegations that he had done terrible things. Do you know Jeriah Mast? I asked. And that was the beginning of the end. They were shocked that I had found him. From there, I told them I would give Christian Aid Ministries several weeks to do the right thing. If they chose not to report, or chose to cover in any way, I would personally go to Haiti and look into the allegations. (To this day, I have recorded testimony of 9 victims that I sent to an FBI liaison). It was one of the most tragic things, to see these young lives devastated by a man who professed to represent God, on the one hand, and destroyed lives in God’s name on the other hand, even praying with his victims.

Upon my return, I wrote a thorough blog, exposing what was being hidden. I reached out to countless Ohio news stations and papers. Most ignored me. I reached out to law enforcement at federal and local levels, as several others also did.

For some years it looked as though he got away with it. I knew Homeland Security was working on it, but with victims paid off, it looked impossible for truth to of his wickedness to be exposed.

So, yes, today I celebrate that the truth is brought to light. I celebrate that one child, or many, somewhere in time, will be spared because he has no access to them. I do not celebrate that such predators exist. I do not celebrate that they are among my people – the Mennonites. But, yes, I do celebrate that it is no longer hidden, and that it will hopefully spare other children from harm. 

In a quote from the article linked above, the law states what the religious community doesn’t seem to grasp, in spite of Jesus’ words in Matthew 18 about harming children. “Crimes against children, like those mentioned in these allegations, are reprehensible. Such appalling and morally corrupt behavior will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law,” said U.S. Attorney David M. Toepfer for the Northern District of Ohio. “We commend the work of Homeland Security Investigations and the Holmes County Sheriff’s Office, whose thorough work led to these federal charges being filed today.”

We, the people of God, should be saying this, loud and clear. The state should not need to say it for us. We should be helping them deal with this corruption, not hiding them among us. Not being more concerned for the predators’ protection from the law, than the children’s protection from the predators.

The cry for mercy on Jeriah Mast’s behalf is strong among those who wish to see him off the hook. In my opinion, whatever mercy Jeriah Mast needs is between him and God. I will let the Highest Power in the universe work those things out with him, spiritually. 

The duty of adults in this life is to protect children and the vulnerable, not cry for mercy for someone who so vilely misrepresented God on the ‘mission’ field that those children may struggle for life to even grasp any kind of loving God.

Shame on us, if the children are forgotten and the predators’ names are whispered in our prayers, through tears.  God’s place among has long been replaced, if that is what ‘church’ and religion have become. 

Because Jesus sits with the bleeding children. He does not have a place to sit in a religious community like that. 

Remember the children. Remember Haiti. Remember Jesus.

And, dear God, bring this wickedness in Your name to an end! Expose every single one. Bring down the systems that cover, harbour and perpetuate this evil. Oftentimes because their high places have their own hidden wickedness.

As always…
Love,
~ T ~

© Splash4Ripples 2025

“Little girl, welcome!” (House of God; House of Horrors)

Splsh4Ripls1 Comment

TRIGGER WARNING: The following poem contains graphic words and content related to sexual abuse of a little child in a religious setting.

*****

Back and forth. Up and down. Little fingers tracing the grooves between the block. Feeling the smooth and rough parts.
Blocks. Concrete blocks.Painted blocks. They made up the big building called the church.
“House of God” they called it.
“Sacred” they told me.
To the child, it was a house of horrors. More like hell.


Crouched beside the wall, running fingers along the blocks.
Unconsciously trying to feel some normalcy and safety.
Up and down. Back and forth.


Sometimes the bushes beside the block walls offered a little protection. I knew which ones offered the best cover.
Slipping between the wall and the blocks or inside the bush itself, I could listen and watch the shoes of members walking by.
Waiting till it was safe to retreat.
Plucking and pinching the red berries while I waited.
Eventually the bushes were taken away.

Exposed.
No place to hide anymore.


The building with block walls was where went to to hear about “god.”
Many songs sung about God’s love.
Lots of words concerning Heaven.
Being taught we were the only way to Jesus.


Up and down, back and forth.
Little fingers on those block walls.
Feel the bumps on the block.
Don’t feel the pain.


Inside those walls, good sounding words were spoken.
Inside those walls, hell broke open.
Jesus loves me upstairs.
The devil killing a child’s soul below.


Jesus loves me.


Grown men closing in. Trapped.
Tight grasp. Fierce struggle.
For one so small, I put up a good fight,
Finally breaking loose.
Force flung her against those blocks walls.
Cold, painted, concrete block walls with the tracing lines.
Ugly, painted walls.
Jeering and laughter.
She’s feisty. Too feisty.
Adult men closing in again.
Tight, painful grip.
A handkerchief to the nose and face.
That’ll teach you! Calm you down.
The block walls with tracing lines start spinning.
Blackness.
And pain.
Shuffling noises.
Presence behind me.

Restriction.
When will I ever be free?
Crossed legged on the floor in so much pain.
Ears ringing.
An adult male body blocks the doorway in a big X shape, making sure
We aren’t detected by the wrong person.
Behind him are seen- those block walls.

Dizzy, confused, in so much pain.
Being forced to walk back upstairs alone.


Jesus…loves me?


If no one protects me, there’s only me to do do.

“You’re to strong willed.”
“You’re rebellious.”
“You hate men.”
“You’re a feminist.”
“You’re bitter.”
“You need to forgive or you’ll go to hell.”
“You need to submit.”
“Your will needs broken.”


It all came from behind those “sacred block walls.”
They taught a child less than a whole handful of years old that
An adult male ultimately loved a child through sexual encounters.
Oral sexual encounters.
Any sexual encounters.
Rape.


Up and down. Back and forth. Trying to make sense of it all.


There was no good sense to be made. None.
There was no “God” in all that happened there either. None.
She turned and walked away from hell.
Screaming,begging if there was
A true God, could she please experience Him?


Words from inside those block walls:
No. You’re walking away from truth. You’re headed for hell fire.
No matter what happened to you, God’s will is for you to accept
It and forgive. You’re bitter. You’ve turned on God.
You’re deceived.
Have you forgiven yet?
How do you even give God another chance?
How have you not given Up on it all?
I did. I gave up on their “god.”
That god is a lie.
That god is not real.
That god is the devil himself.
I gave up on the god thrown at me behind those block

Walls. He wasn’t there in “that” at all.
She knows now that Jesus does not abuse.
Neither does He endorse abuse.
The real Jesus doesn’t force her to be mistreated.
I haven’t given up on God.
No.
I’m finally learning Who He really is.
Do they say I’m lost?
Yes.
Do I care? No.
The God I know now set me free from the
Imprisonments of those hellish block walls.
No justice on earth could ever repay what happened inside those block walls.
Some day all will be made known.
Justice is in the hands of the court of higher powers.
I walk free.
Free to find truth.
Free to pursue healing.
No more block walls.
Only freedom. And healing

~ Little Girl ~

No child should ever, ever have to experience this hell in the name of any god. And the True God will never bless the house that overlooks, enables, or protects the perpetrators. Justice is coming, via the One True Advocate.

Little Girl, you are worth so much more. You are cherished. You are precious. Your courage is the hope that every other little girl needs.

Little Girl, you are loved.

As always…
Love,
~ T~

© Trudy Metzger 2024

Sherry Showalter’s story of sexual, emotional and spiritual trauma and healing

Splsh4Ripls3 Comments

Introduction:
The following story was sent to me via Messenger, from the author, whom I had never heard of before. She asked if I might share her story, so I asked if she wanted me to share it on my blog. That’s how this post came to be.

As you read her story, parts that bring her comfort may be triggering for you. .

Over the years, victims have shared with me how hard it is to sit in church — sometimes the very building in which they were sexually abused — and listen to ‘the right words’ when they were treated so harshly. Their suffering shamed and disregarded, while their abuser was forgiven and coddled, accepted as godly, and embraced where they were rejected. Some find comfort in church again. Some never do. Both are ok. There are other ways to find fellowship without a designated building.

Many have also shared how triggering it is to hear that God will use our trauma for good. This is particularly traumatic if you are taught that the horrible things that happen to you are somehow ‘God’s will.’ What kind of god ‘wills’ for children to be raped and abused … and then ‘uses it for good’? And what kind of ‘church’ promotes this warped theology?

Children being raped is not the will of any God I would trust. These horrific acts are not his will, nor is the harm survivors suffer. They never were His will. They never will be. It is called ‘spiritual bypassing’ to avoid contending with hard reality and try to explain away harm by spiritualizing trauma and tragedy.

God’s will was that we run around naked in a garden, oblivious to all but relationship and beauty. That was God’s will. He didn’t make evil, death and trauma ‘his will’, just because that’s where we find ourselves. He redeems. He restores. But He doesn’t bring sexual abuse and violence into our lives and call it His will.

His will, to be true to His nature as shown in the bible, must always be redemption, restoration, healing and wholeness. Not the hell of life. That suffering is the tragic aftermath of human sin. And human sin never is God’s will, therefore nor is the aftermath of it. That, or He is not God at all. He cannot be both the Redeemer *and* the one whose will is that we suffer at the hands of sin..

As you read Sherry’s story, remember that ‘bringing good from evil’ doesn’t mean, ever, that the evil was designed by God or ‘God’s will.’ And if you can’t step foot in church because of the trauma and abuse you have suffered, I reckon Jesus will sit with you outside of that building. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

It wasn’t.

~ Trudy ~

*****

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ sexual and spiritual abuse.

I feel like it is time to share a little piece of my story and testimony.

First, I want to say the following:

1) I want to state, that not all plain conservative churches respond to sexual abuse in the way mine was handled. I have since been a part of a conservative group that were NOTHING like how I grew up.

2) This is NOT a poor me, pity me post. This is, however, a post of how God can take the most awful things done to us by those who call themselves Christians, and use it for good. It is about God taking the ugly, the darkness and the lies I’ve been told and replacing it with His Wholeness, His Righteousness and His Truth.

I believe it was the year of 2008.

I was living in the basement of a couple from church. Over time, I came to trust them and open up to them. They gave me a lot of sound biblical advice. They cared. One night I decided it was time I tell them that I had been sexually assaulted. They had promised that they wouldn’t tell anyone. “Well, at least not right now,” he said. I went to bed that night feeling lighter in heart and spirit than I had in a long time. I no longer carried my shame and pain alone. I thought I would finally be able to heal from the trauma. Maybe the future would be okay to face after all. Little did I know the pain, the betrayal and the heart crushing trauma that lay ahead.

The next morning, I was informed, at the breakfast table, that one of the ministers and his wife were coming over any minute to talk to me. I asked him, “you didn’t tell them what I shared did you?” Yes, he said, I did. I felt my heart leave my chest and drop to my stomach with a gut wrenching nausea. I wasn’t ready to talk to anyone else about it yet! I used up all the courage I had the night before! They arrived and I had to talk about something I wasn’t ready to share with anyone else at that point. As we talked, I was informed that I would need to make a confession in church because it had happened even after I was a member of the church! I was horrified and tried to tell them it wasn’t my fault, I didn’t want it! I plead with them while tears streamed down my face and my whole body shook from the inside out. It didn’t change their minds. They said, by confessing it to the whole church I would find healing and forgiveness.

On the night that the church gathered, I sat there and made a decision. I would wall off another piece of my heart. I would bury it where not even God could find it. Anger boiled inside me as my trauma, shame and ugliness was told to the whole church. I was re-traumatized that night. I felt assaulted all over again in front of the whole church. I felt even dirtier and more shame than before. I walked to the back of the church where I stood as each member came and shook my hand. Most of the members said, “we forgive you.” A few said nothing at all. 5 ladies whispered in my ear, as they pulled me in to embrace me, “I am so sorry this happened to you, or you didn’t deserve this.” (Those 5 ladies will forever have a place in my heart ❤️) But to each person who said “we forgive you” I wanted to punch them and scream at them, “THIS WASNT MY FAULT!” By them saying, we forgive you, they were telling me that it was my fault, that I had some dirty sin that needed to be forgiven! (Or, that is what it felt to me they were saying)

Something happened to me that night that changed me in ways they will never know. Only after much counseling have I been able to heal and forgive them for the pain, trauma, and the spiritual abuse they caused me. After many years I am finally at a place of wholeness enough to share.

A few people who have heard my story have asked, “how are you even still a Christian and go to chruch?” I answer them with a question, “How can I not?” How can I not be a Christian and worship God in a church house? It wasn’t Jesus who failed me or hurt me, it was people.”

Jesus found that piece of my heart that I buried away. He nurtured it, He held it and when I finally let Him, He healed it. He put it back in place. My heart is whole, but it has many scars on it and that is okay, because you want to know something? Jesus has scars too and He bears those scars for me and for you.

To anyone who has experienced this trauma and pain, or any other, you are not alone. I care about your pain. I understand if and why you may not have the courage to set foot in a church right now. And that is okay. Your heart needs time and space to process and heal. I know God will bring to you healing from the darkest of darkness in your heart. One day you will be able to go back to church and realize that it’s okay to be there, it doesn’t hurt anymore because of what Jesus will do in your life.

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭1:6‬ ‭TPT‬‬

I pray with great faith for you, because I’m fully convinced that the One who began this gracious work in you will faithfully continue the process of maturing you until the unveiling of our Lord Jesus Christ.

– Sherry Showarlter –
Bio: Sherry is married with a son who is a miracle. She loves singing, animals, being a mom, gardening, and making food for other people.

****

If you find yourself in a state of trauma and suffering as a result of sexual, spiritual or other abuse, there is support available. Finding a trauma informed counsellor who understands the harm abuse does, and helps you move beyond the harm to healing, is a powerful gift. I’ve heard horror stories of ‘counsellors’ — some licensed, some not — who have escalated the harm through ignorance, or who have no clue how to invite survivors to healing. If you have a counsellor and you are still stuck in the same place 6 months, 1 year, 2 years or — as in one case — almost 20 years later, I might suggest finding a different counsellor. If they urge you not to report or speak of the abuse, run for the hills. If they do not support you in what *you* need for healing, run for the hills. There are sincere and effective counsellors. Don’t give up until you find one, if that is what you need.

Above all, I wish you healing and hope. Life is hard enough with hope, to walk through this suffering with no hope is harder.

As always….

Love,
~ T ~

© Trudy Metzger 2024