Matthew 18

Generally, I no longer write, and definitely don’t do blogs, due to severe issues with my left hand and arm when doing so, and consequences I suffer for sitting. But today, I am resurfacing to do an update on Jeriah Mast’s crimes in Haiti.

On December 2, 2025, Jeriah Mast was charged on four counts of engaging in illicit sexual conduct with minors. (Read the article here: Ohio Missionary Indicted for Child Exploitation Crimes in Haiti) The question many have is, why only four? The answer is simple. Christian Aid Ministries – and God forbid we call it what it is and say they “paid off the victims in exchange for silence” – paid victims. Whatever justification or excuse for offering those funds, it effectively silenced most victims. Let me say this, I will thank God for the four. And I will celebrate Mast’s arrest.

In the past I have been accused of ‘finding joy when one more Mennonite man is arrested.’ If that is how you read that last sentence in the first paragraph, let me break it down in simplest of terms.

I. Thank. God. When. Any. Predator. Is. Brought. To. Justice.

I do not care if religious or other. I do not care if male or female. I do not care if Mennonite, Amish, Catholic, Protestant, atheist, gay, straight, political, advocate, or any other affiliation or lack thereof.

I never celebrate that there are predators. I have never thrilled at exposing them because of their culture. But, in any culture, I will always celebrate when truth is brought to light and when children are protected.

I thank God because one child, somewhere, or maybe a 100 or more, will not be abused by that predator. At least not while they are locked up. Because most reoffend when they are released.

Today, years after flying to Haiti in June of 2019 – which I did because there were signs of extreme coverup by Christian Aid Ministries – today, I thank God that Jeriah Mast will face the law for what he did to at least four of the countless children he is alleged to have harmed.

I will never forget being told, in semi-whispers, about Mast’s alleged crimes in Haiti. The individual who told me about it knew I was an advocate who would not be silent, and did not tell me his name, or any information to easily find him. What they did not account for, was my uncanny ability to piece things together, and in a child sex assault case with current minors, you better believe I gave all I had, regardless of relational fallout.

I had no name. Not a first name. Not a last name. I only had several tiny snippets of information. He had worked for Christian Aid Ministries for years. He was conservative Anabaptist. I was quite sure I knew what state he was from. And I knew some basic family ties of in-laws, though not many names. With that I sat down at the computer and began digging. There was no way that any person – especially religious – would go abroad and harm children without being brought face to face with the law, if I could help it. Not on my watch. I found his name after much sleuthing. And somehow I knew.

I messaged the individual who spoke with me about a couple fleeing Haiti because of allegations that he had done terrible things. Do you know Jeriah Mast? I asked. And that was the beginning of the end. They were shocked that I had found him. From there, I told them I would give Christian Aid Ministries several weeks to do the right thing. If they chose not to report, or chose to cover in any way, I would personally go to Haiti and look into the allegations. (To this day, I have recorded testimony of 9 victims that I sent to an FBI liaison). It was one of the most tragic things, to see these young lives devastated by a man who professed to represent God, on the one hand, and destroyed lives in God’s name on the other hand, even praying with his victims.

Upon my return, I wrote a thorough blog, exposing what was being hidden. I reached out to countless Ohio news stations and papers. Most ignored me. I reached out to law enforcement at federal and local levels, as several others also did.

For some years it looked as though he got away with it. I knew Homeland Security was working on it, but with victims paid off, it looked impossible for truth to of his wickedness to be exposed.

So, yes, today I celebrate that the truth is brought to light. I celebrate that one child, or many, somewhere in time, will be spared because he has no access to them. I do not celebrate that such predators exist. I do not celebrate that they are among my people – the Mennonites. But, yes, I do celebrate that it is no longer hidden, and that it will hopefully spare other children from harm.

In a quote from the article linked above, the law states what the religious community doesn’t seem to grasp, in spite of Jesus’ words in Matthew 18 about harming children. “Crimes against children, like those mentioned in these allegations, are reprehensible. Such appalling and morally corrupt behavior will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law,” said U.S. Attorney David M. Toepfer for the Northern District of Ohio. “We commend the work of Homeland Security Investigations and the Holmes County Sheriff’s Office, whose thorough work led to these federal charges being filed today.”

We, the people of God, should be saying this, loud and clear. The state should not need to say it for us. We should be helping them deal with this corruption, not hiding them among us. Not being more concerned for the predators’ protection from the law, than the children’s protection from the predators.

The cry for mercy on Jeriah Mast’s behalf is strong among those who wish to see him off the hook. In my opinion, whatever mercy Jeriah Mast needs is between him and God. I will let the Highest Power in the universe work those things out with him, spiritually.

The duty of adults in this life is to protect children and the vulnerable, not cry for mercy for someone who so vilely misrepresented God on the ‘mission’ field that those children may struggle for life to even grasp any kind of loving God.

Shame on us, if the children are forgotten and the predators’ names are whispered in our prayers, through tears. God’s place among has long been replaced, if that is what ‘church’ and religion have become.

Because Jesus sits with the bleeding children. He does not have a place to sit in a religious community like that.

Remember the children. Remember Haiti. Remember Jesus.

And, dear God, bring this wickedness in Your name to an end! Expose every single one. Bring down the systems that cover, harbour and perpetuate this evil. Oftentimes because their high places have their own hidden wickedness.

As always…
Love,
~ T ~

The author of today’s blog is one of the most courageous women I’ve ever known. Greatest courage comes in facing our greatest fear and trauma. She does this. She is also a woman of incredible faith. Deepest faith is birthed in dark struggles where believing is almost impossible, yet believing is all we have. Where light is not present, yet Light is all we hold on to. You will hear this in her writing.

Faith, I’ve concluded, is a very different thing than we have been led to believe. It is the struggle, not the certainty. It is not knowing, yet daring to believe. It is not seeing or feeling God, yet crying out to Him whether in pain, or grief or anger, or all of these at once.

In the survivors of horror and their struggle, I have encountered Jesus like no where else in the world. He really does dwell with the brokenhearted. It is an honour to be able to share this woman’s story with you.

This blog is a personal journal entry that she shared with me a while ago. I was so moved by it, I offered to share it with the public if ever she would be comfortable doing so. With deep appreciation for her vulnerability, I invite you to to a sacred glimpse inside her story and struggle.

This is the life of a sex abuse survivor in religious community.

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TRIGGER WARNING: Do not read further if you are sensitive to rape and sexual violence testimony. The following post is a very personal heart cry from a survivor.

She is the wife of the gentleman who wrote “What I Wish You Knew About Childhood Sexual Abuse (A Husband’s Perspective”

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Where were you, Jesus, when I was seven – a little girl, innocent and sweet- who found herself in a dungeon of darkness with evil men? Where were you when I was playdough in the hands of evil? What were you thinking when they took every last shred of my dignity and innocence? Where were you when there were hands all over me – pinching, feeling, slapping, manipulating? Where were you when I tried to get away from the pain, and one of my captors got angry and shoved himself into every possible place on my body? Where were you when my body gave up – gave in to the manipulation of hands and voices – and my spirit gave up too? Where were you when they mocked me? Where were you when they told me I was their “girl” – that this is what I was made for? Where were you when I believed them…what else was I supposed to believe, Jesus?

I cried out to You the whole time! I kept saying, “Help me, Jesus. Help me!” And in my little girl mind, You didn’t come. I was alone with evil. I was completely powerless. I was in the hands of evil, and completely at the mercy of evil – and there was none.

None.

Only pain with a horrible mix of pleasure. Mocking laughter. Blood. Evil hands. Body parts. Out of place limbs. Darkness. Vulture eyes.

Three or four grown men.

And little seven year old me.

You told me once, God, that you were there when that happened. I desperately want to believe that. You told me you protected me – that you kept it from getting worse. I want to believe that.

But I don’t feel it. And I wish, Jesus, that I could see the scene in my mind with You in it. Right now, I can’t. It’s just me – alone – with evil men. Is it asking too much, Jesus, to ask you to revise that scene with the Truth?

I’m sorry if I’m asking for a sign out of unbelief.

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5 hours later: In my mind, I’m about 7-12 years old. A little girl with no voice. In my body, I’m about 60. I am SO old. So tired. So weak. So much pain.

But the calendar says I’m 27.

I feel like I’m dying. Is this what it feels like to be alive? To feel?

I didn’t know I was so tired. My poor body.

I feel awful for that little girl. She’s kept pressing on all these years.

Now she’s breaking. But is it safe to break?

I don’t know.

Now she’s a mom and a wife. Is it okay to break when she’s a mom and wife?

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After years of holding in the pain, I am afraid that if I begin to cry, I will never stop. It’s hard for people to grasp the kind of terror that leaves a person so damaged that they cannot remember how it feels to be safe, loved, innocent and free.

As I mopped the floor, my tears mingled with the mop water. I was crying to hard I had to lean over a chair to catch my breath…

“God, I’m too scared to live, and I’m too scared to die (emotionally). All these years I have tried to control my life, because I remember how it felt to be out of control and be completely at the mercy of evil hands. And there was none, even though I cried out to You as a little seven year old girl.

You’ve told me You were there…but where? Where, God? How can I live today if I don’t know where you were then? It’s not safe. But it’s not safe to keep trying to control everything either. I’m hurting myself and my family.

I’m stuck God. Stuck between the reality of a broken world where there is no safe place and what I know in my head.

I’m waiting, God. Waiting for You to reframe that trauma for me with You in the picture. I’m holding on, God. Those rainbows You sent mean something. They were not complete rainbows, just partial.

I will hold on to the little faith I have and I will wait for You.”

~ the warrior child ~

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EDIT: There is speculation out there that these men were not Anabaptist. They were, and they are. And today they are all in conservative Anabaptist leadership. Two are ministers. One is in other leadership, and would be too revealing to disclose. Not one of them has ever taken ownership, apologized, or faced legal consequences.

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Having read the blog, remember the very courageous young woman who lived this story. It is hard to stomach. Hard to read. But it is a story of courage, resilience and faith, first and foremost. The author is still a conservative Anabaptist. More importantly, she is a woman who loves Jesus and knows Him more personally than many who never needed to struggle through her ‘hell’ and try to find His love for her in spite of her suffering.

Let’s honour her in this story, and lift up Jesus.

Matthew 18:6-7, 10

But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe to the world because of offenses!

For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes! […]

Take heed that you do not despise one of these little ones, for I say to you that in heaven their angels always see the face of My Father who is in heaven.

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As always…

With love,
~ T ~

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THE GATHERING, NOVEMBER 2, 2019, LANCASTER BIBLE COLLEGE:
One of the things we are working toward November 2, 2019, at THE GATHERING, is creating a place where we collectively invite God into our grief. It is exclusively for Anabaptist survivors of sexual abuse, and their trusted support persons to join together for a day of acknowledging the generations of suffering. We will cry out to God, together. The invitation is to ‘come as you are’ in your raw brokenness, if that’s where you’re at, or in your healed togetherness. The itinerary is simple. It isn’t about ‘who’ or ‘how’; it is about Jesus and a safe place to meet, to heal another layer, together.

NOTE: Anyone over 18 who sexually assaulted someone – whether child or other adult – is not welcome. This does not mean they are not forgiven if they have repented. It means victims should not fear being confronted with the source of their trauma on such a vulnerable day. Security guards will be present to remove any who show up and are identified as offenders by the victims.

Until August 1, 2019, registration for the day’s events includes lunch and attendance to the evening concert with Jason Gray, whose music had brought hope and healing to countless victims. Songs like “The Wound is Where the Light Gets In“, “A Way to See in the Dark“, Sparrows“, “Nothing is Wasted“, and many more speak a language we understand.

(More information for potential attendees is available under THE GATHERING Registration and for non-attendees at THE GATHERING Information.)

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