Looking back to those early days, and dreaming of life with Tim, as we planned for our wedding, it was a stark contrast from what I was familiar with in men. I realize how very blessed I was, and am, to have someone like him.
It could all have been very different. Most of the males in my life, prior to that time, left me broken, wounded and stripped of identity. It’s what I had known at home, and what I had come to expect.
When Howard stepped into the father role in my life, and treated me with dignity, respect and care, my expectation changed. I saw that I had value. And that changed everything.
By the way he treated me, Tim redeemed the pain and trauma of the past. Where life had been suffocated, his gentle love brought healing and new life. At times, when I couldn’t express my heart any other way, I turned to poetry. Often poems would flow without effort, requiring almost no editing.
But when I thought of how Tim had moved my heart from a place of betrayal and fear of men, into a place of trust–moving me to a place Beyond Betrayal–I sat for hours, working on it.
This poem, written to honour Tim and the gift of his love, was a labour of love, as I tried to find words to show the contrast in the impact Tim had on me, and the state in which he found me, due to devastating aftermath of previous unhealthy male relationships. I felt as if all that life had stolen from me, was given back to me through his love…
© Trudy Metzger
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